The men still bunched up and made an excellent target for Bolivar to throw his hand grenades into. This time, Bolivar got off three grenades before th... men were dispersed too much to be good targets, but he did manage to wound more men this time. For some reason or other, the horses were brought under control more easily and quickly than last time, so the cowboys were able to charge the house, firing their pistols and shotguns. Jason was right about the type of shotguns in use. The cowboys. As we sat on the concrete levee overlooking the river, I found myself rebuffed at any sort of small talk; however, business was an easy topic. Marie-Claire had outgrown her present property and wanted to open a second site closer to the city. We made arrangements for me to drive out to her nursery after the weekend and I walked her back to her car.I stood in the middle of the street watching her car slip down the street and vanish around the corner. A spell had been cast upon me and I was. There was a noise from outside the door of the room and for a moment I thought we were about to get busted.'Relax,' she said lacing her fingers and stretching up to the ceiling. She twisted her arms luxuriously. 'The door's locked, remember?' Her body was loose and alive and I envied her. I stretched out my arms too, hoping that in emulating her I might relax a bit to. The room was light and airy, the breeze from an open window billowing the curtains. This was nothing like the cramped bathroom. Years later I finally understood, intellectually at least, that Ihad not killed my father. He had killed himself by drinking andthen driving. He could just as easily have killed me or someoneelse. But that particular combination of feelings, thehelplessness and frustration and rage that I felt while trappedin that car blasted their way into my memory. Those feelings wereback now, fueling my tears. I can't always predict when thesedreadful memories will invade my consciousness, but I do know.
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